Point of No Return

Generation gap a complete joke

One of these days, I’ll find her.

I will track down U.S. Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton if it kills me, charm my way past her gaggle of security personnel and find myself face-to-face with the noted woman. And I will thank her. Oh, how I’ll thank her.

An offering of thanks to my mother

Life begets stress.

We all find those things than can quicken the pulse throughout the basic elements of living our lives. Relationships, family, work, war in the Middle East, rising gas and electricity prices ... the very practice of going through life’s peaks and valleys is probably the most stressful thing many of us can do to ourselves.

Tricky situation has but one cold fact

It is against the law to be in this country illegally.

Wow, one neat little sentence made my whole argument for me this week. I guess I can go home now. You all have been great. Enjoy your Easter and don’t forget to tip your bartender.

Well, on second thought, I guess I could go a little deeper into this line of thought.

A little thanking for some spanking

A proposed bill in the state house would allow each school district to choose whether or not it would like to instill corporal punishment in its schools. If a district decided to enact the right, parents would then have to give permission for their children to receive discipline by way of the paddle. Wow, all this talk of heiney-targeted discipline makes me nostalgic.

March angst brings April hope

And I thought having St. Patrick’s Day fall on a Friday was the coolest thing ever ...

March angst brings April hope

And I thought having St. Patrick’s Day fall on a Friday was the coolest thing ever ...

We are all indeed Irish today

Two full days of doing nothing but lying on my couch and watching the Cartoon Network with a steady stream of sweat cascading down my face. Two days of alternating between restless naps and dazed stumbles to the facilities. Two days.

There is glory in this.

Not responding well to nature

It’s been said that a wise man knows his limitations. While not quite ready to claim any discernible level of wisdom, I will say that I am well aware of many of my own limitations.

For instance, I am a giant wuss.

At last, a little comfort for Whites

My father is a man who finds satisfaction through the joys of repetition. Specifically, he seems to gather solace through repeating the same quotes over and over again — either to stress the significance of his message to the recipient, or to just strengthen his belief in the words he regurgitates.

It's always a matter of timing

You want to know what stinks? I’ll tell you what stinks: Vice President Dick Cheney shoots a lawyer, and it happens over a weekend. That’s what stinks.

A different Super Bowl look

Wow. The Rolling Stones have certainly gotten old.

Pols and pols often a team

According to the latest polls, approximately 42 percent of the nation believes the president is doing a good job. Various favorability ratings go along the same vein, while other polls show the public’s confidence in his leadership skills rates a little higher. A figure on pollingreport.com shows that approximately 40 percent of the population approves of Judge Alito’s appointment and ...

Fingering out life's problems

In my perfect world, wars will be fought by having leaders face-off in one-on-one fights to the death in steel cage matches on pay-per-view television, and schools across the world would be thought of as safe havens for our students to learn without fear of violence or oppression.

Keep an eye on ... everything

There are certainly plenty of things to fear in this world.

This is some Sirius cabbage

It’s recently become painfully obvious to me that I’m in the wrong business.

New Christmas present a blast

It’s human nature, I suppose. Many of us hold this burning desire in our souls to dive into the pool of personal nostalgia and revisit moments in our past through either fond or particularly hurtful memories. We do it by retelling old stories, flipping through yellowed photographs in a musty shoebox or simply closing our eyes and mentally taking a stroll down memory lane.

Taking one last look at 2005

It was the best of times ... nah.

Call me Ishmael ... nah.

Traditions are tough to forget

Traditionally, this is a season of tradition.

We collectively share some of these traditions, such as singing carols, admiring a giant Santa Claus hat on top of the totem pole in Bethany Beach or just watching those time-tested television classics that somehow still fill us with a sense of warmth every year. We send cards, hang up the cards we receive and swallow aspirin by the handful.

A small moment to give thanks

Life moves fast. That statement’s probably right up there with water is wet, Mark Hardt is loud and Dr. Phil always takes the woman’s side, but it’s a stone-cold fact.

The love doctor is now in

All that wasted money on candy and flowers ...

Those books available that teach a man the proper way to treat a woman? Bogus. The lessons my father taught me about being a man and respecting women? Hah! Alan Alda and all that sensitive hoo-ha? Lies.

Sleazy twosome out of Philly

“I fight for what I think is right.”
— Terrell Owens, Nov. 8, 2005
What a yahoo.

It's all survival of the fittest

Toothbrush? Check. Sanitizing wipes? Check. Set of dominoes and big fuzzy hat ...

Never mind.

Let's dissect the new words

Words are good.

Spoken or written, words relay our thoughts, our messages, our feelings and emotions. Different languages can be translated to convey the meaning of the words and, when grouped together just the right way, they can sound, well, pretty.

The name is the game here

Stealth in advance, the hunter stalks his prey and mentally surveys potential avenues of attack. Decided on an ultimate course of action, he pounces on his victim, taking that which is most important.

That’s how I felt as I swiped this column idea straight from the lips of our office manager, Monica Fleming.

Community shines bright...again

I humble myself before you.

Once again, the call has gone out for help. Once again, this community has rolled up its collective sleeves, plunged headfirst into the effort and has responded with an outpouring of love and money that is destined to soothe another human’s wounds.

Not always easy to say bye

We’ve lost one of our own. And that’s never easy.

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